Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die!
This is so priceless and so easy to see happening - customer service being what it is today!
A family member placed a call to the Royal Bank:
Family Member:
'I am calling to tell you that she died in January.'
Royal Bank:'The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply.'
Family Member:
'Maybe you should turn it over to collections.'
Royal Bank:
'Since it is two months past due, it already has been...'
Family Member:
So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?'
Royal Bank PAC:
'Either report her account to the frauds division or report her to the credit bureau, maybe both!'
Family Member:
'Do you think God will be mad at her?'
Royal Bank:
'Excuse me?'
Family Member:
'Did you just get what I was telling you . . . The part about her being dead?'
Royal Bank:
'Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor.'
Supervisor gets on the phone:
Family Member:
'I'm calling to tell you she died in January.'
Royal Bank:
'The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply.'
Family Member:
'You mean you want to collect from her estate?'
Royal Bank:
(Stammer) 'Are you her lawyer?'
Family Member:
'No, I'm her great nephew.'
(Lawyer info given)
Royal Bank:
'Could you fax us a certificate of death?'
Family Member:
'Sure.'
( fax number is given )
After they get the fax:
Royal Bank:
'Our system just isn't set up for death. I don't know what more I can do to help.'
Family Member:
'Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing Her. I don't think she will care.'
Royal Bank :
'Well, the late fees and charges do still apply.'
Family Member:
'Would you like her new billing address?'
Royal Bank:
'That might help.'
Family Member:
' Rookwood Memorial Cemetery , 1249 Centenary Rd, Sydney Plot Number 1049.'
Royal Bank:
'Sir, that's a cemetery!'
Family Member: 'Well, what the Fuck do you do with dead people on your planet?'........
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